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(1 - 26) of 26 OFCS Rating: 50% Rotten Page   1   "Strip away all the visual gimmickery, and 'My Bloody Valentine 3-D' is no better than the lukewarm '80s slasher movie that inspired it."   ReelTalk Movie Reviews   A. J. Hakari "it is a vacuous trawl through horror's more sensationalist tropes... but that is just another way of saying that this is popcorn cinema at its most unapologetic and unpretentious, guaranteed to delight gorehounds and to bring young lovers closer together."   Channel 4 Film   Anton Bitel 3.5/5 "it works like a blood-spattered charm"   Filmcritic.com   Bill Gibron C- "This 2009 update isn't interested in manufacturing a severe facelift, instead holding tight to the dog-eared slasher playbook, adding the gimmick of 3-D to provide audiences with a front row seat to terror, and, for the most part, atrocious acting."   BrianOrndorf.com   Brian Orndorf 3/5 "It's a lousy movie all around, but I had a great time watching it."   eFilmCritic.com   David Cornelius 1.5/4 "...a consistently underwhelming horror endeavor that seems to exist for no reason other than to serve the current 3D fad..."   Reel Film Reviews   David Nusair 2.5/4 "Doesn't quite match the original in terms of its overriding eeriness. It does, however, live up to the second word in the title. My Bloody Valentine is a visual blast."   DustinPutman.com   Dustin Putman B- "It manages a few surprises -- and in a genre as worn-out as this one, a few surprises are all it takes."   EricDSnider.com   Eric D. Snider C "Just drab and disposable rather than offensive, a throwback that's more of a throwaway."   One Guy's Opinion   Frank Swietek 3/4 "undeniably hokey, but also giddily effective, with the 3-D turning what might otherwise be a routine slash-and-hack job into a ridiculously gory theme park ride"   Q Network Film Desk   James Kendrick 46/100 "Valentine is not attempting to appeal to highbrows, but its general lack of ambition in the face of both a potentially exciting new technology and a script that suggests a potential emphasis on characterization is rather dispiriting."   MovieMartyr.com   Jeremy Heilman "Parental Content Review"   Screen It!   Jim Judy 3.0/4.0 "Sure, the 3-D thing is a gimmick, right along with the gratuitous violence and nudity, but the real surprise is that it's not a bad horror film, either."   MovieCrypt.com   Kevin A. Ranson 3.5/5 "Body parts are lopped off. Pick axes are stabbed at the camera. There's even a completely naked girl chased by the killer, in glorious 3D. This movie spoke to me."   7M Pictures   Kevin Carr 2/6 "This briskly paced remake of the 1981 slasher goes easy on the cheesy 3-D effects while delivering lots of seriously nasty gore."   Time Out New York   Maitland McDonagh "[C]heat[s] at the end. In such a huge way that it's the most stunningly bad thing about the movie. And it's not like there's not a lot of competition for the bad here."   Flick Filosopher   MaryAnn Johanson 2.5/4 "One ultimately settles into the usual slasher movie viewing pattern of not so much really watching than simply waiting for the next kill."   TheMovieReport.com   Michael Dequina 4/5 "My Bloody Valentine is a fun throwback to the golden era of slasher movies--packed with gore, nudity, and the classic gimmick of 3D."   Mike Bracken's Horror Films   Mike Bracken 2.5/4 "Mildly proficient as far as throwbacks go."   Slant Magazine   Nick Schager 1/5 "Meu desejo era o de que o Mineiro realmente aproveitasse a tecnologia tridimensional e, acabando com meu sofrimento, rasgasse a tela com sua picareta, libertando-me da tortura de acompanhar suas aventuras."   Cinema em Cena   Pablo Villaca 4/5 "On some dumb and fundamental level, it delivers the goods in a manner that will no doubt entertain its target audience and will no doubt cause everyone else to either throw up their hands in disgust or merely throw up."   eFilmCritic.com   Peter Sobczynski "Though it stands as one of the better horror remakes to come along in recent memory, 2009's My Bloody Valentine still only just passes for competent watchability."   Projection Booth   Rob Humanick C+ "Slasher movies already know how to vary the same gag over and over, which means they can keep the 3-D plate spinning far longer than other, more 'respectable' genres could."   Mania.com   Rob Vaux 4/5 "On par with Chainsaw '03 and Dawn '04. No pretense, no delusions, just slick, basic stalk & shock mayhem with a 3-D coating that works unexpectedly well."   FEARnet   Scott Weinberg "I am no fan of slasher films, and I came to this with no expectations - who needs another remake? - but it won me over in spite of myself."   ESplatter   Steve Biodrowski 4/10 "If the imagination and enthusiasm behind the gore effects set it in the top tier of slasher movies, the rest of the film is no better than any of them."   Antagony & Ecstasy   Tim Brayton  (1 - 26) of 26 OFCS Rating: 50% Rotten Page   1